Showered With Love x 2

My team, my heart and soul at work, gave us the most amazing shower at school last week. Every detail was perfect from the individually floral taped Gerber Daisies, the cake that matched Kallie's bedding, to the "to die for" punch. A slideshow and song, set to Kallie's nursery theme, played while guests were arriving. I can't wait to light Kallie's candle that sat by the guest book, along with the little tiny shoes and a poem. My sweet team thoughtfully signed messages from the heart in Kallie's Twelve Gifts of Birth book. And, most of all, the company was perfect.

My high school (and elementary school!) friends also gave me the most creative shower with thoughtful touches at every turn on Saturday. I was greeted with a pink fuzzy "Mommy" embroidered robe with matching slippers (flip flops, yeah!) and very soon the house was transformed into a spa. Students from a local beauty school came and treated us to manicures and pedicures of our choice. The cake was a perfect match with Kallie's bedding, the flowers were beautifully arranged and fragrant, and I am still craving Creme Brulee french toast after tasting the yummy food (complete with a chocolate fountain!). A beautifully framed picture we had not even seen yet of My Babe's hands and my hands around my belly sat in the entry way. And, Kallie will forever read the framed quotes of my sweet friends that wrote why My Babe and I would make good parents. It was amazing.

Laughter And Love

An evening spent with my team. An evening of relaxing, food, laughter, fun, joy and love. An evening listening to Christmas music and the beautiful sound of BMW's piano playing. An evening of teasing, jokes, gift exchanges, light-hearted conversation, and hints of deep moments too. An evening where I feel like the luckiest girl around to have such a bond with so many people at once. An evening where I can be myself, let my guard down, peek through the walls, because they will love me no matter what. An evening where I look around the room during the story telling and think there is no other place I'd rather be right now. And even though there are a few longtime team members missing, it was an evening to reflect on things of which I am thankful. The people that mean the world to me.

An evening of laughter and love...just what I needed.

An Aching Heart That Cannot Be Fixed

Let's face it - I don't get close to people. I still talk often to the same friends I have known since elementary, middle, and high school. I have no friends from college. Not one. I have friends from work, but we don't actively do things together.

And then there is my team...adopted team members included.

My team that celebrates the good, and cries along with me during the bad...every single day. My team that lets me rant, rave, act like a brat, and still loves me like family. So, how does one patch a hole the size of the universe when a team member (and possibly two) leaves? I can't stop crying. Another town is close, yet so much farther than I imagined. Especially when it is someone that is so deeply seeded in my heart. It won't go away. She is packing and moving as I type. I said my goodbyes today, but I already want to see her again. My heart aches and it cannot be fixed.

Blessed

There are very few people in the world that can truly say they thoroughly enjoy every minute spent in the company of their coworkers. When I was fortunate enough to be hired at FBE 8 years ago, it was pretty apparent the team I was entering into was nothing but the best. My team has seen me through a great abundance of challenges from marriage, death of my dad, loss of my hair (as funny as it seems now!), divorce, debt, remarriage, and 4 baby losses. Although our team has changed over the years, I have been blessed to be surrounded by a support system that I'm not sure I will ever find again in a work setting.

After our latest baby loss, my sweet team...and our 2 adopted team members (DC and MK)...gave us the most thoughtful gift we could receive - a weekend away from home. A weekend to forget the sadness, loss, stress, and worry. A weekend to reconnect and have fun. Today we are off to Canyon of the Eagles. Other than my team, very few people know how badly I need this. So, thank you from the depths of my heart. Thank you for putting up with the drama that continues to be my life. You are all my daily rock I lean very heavily on.